Don’t stand in Lucy’s way, she is on a mission of revenge. #Lucy movie in theaters NOW! Get tickets!
nice gender did your mom pick it out for you
No, my dad did.
I literally scrolled past this and then scrolled back up real quick to reblog because I finally understood the joke.
I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND
i’M LAUGHING SO HARD
I may have taught this spider to knit.
I was finishing the last 20 rows at the park, when this little spider wandered over to me, It climbed up my knitting bag, and walked all up and down the piece, then climbed onto my hand and watched me for a couple rows.
After the second row it started waving it’s front four legs as if to get my attention. Once I was looking at it, it started pulling silk from its spinneret, and fiddling with it. I don’t know if it was knitting or purling as it was quite small scale, but every few seconds it would stop and look up at me to see if I was still watching. After a little bit I moved it to one of the vines overhanging the archway I was sitting in, and it went about its business.
This wasn’t the only unusual thing that happened at the park today, but it was the most unusual.
Maybe it thought you were a spider
I’m gonna level with you that’s the fucking cutest shit I have ever fucking heard of okay I want a little spider that knits not sits menacingly above my bed at night threatening to fall into my mouth.
do you ever think about the judges for the triwizard tournament trying to figure out who to kidnap for the second task
like they’re all just sitting in dumbledore’s office and karkaroff goes “well word on the street says that krum has a crush on that granger girl”
"damn," says dumbledore, "I wanted harry to rescue her. well, what about the delightful miss chang?"
"no," says bagman, "we’ve got her down for diggory"
"stop sinking my ships," says dumbledore
YOU CANT CHANGE THE VOLUME OF THE VOICE IN YOUR HEAD
FUCKING TRY I DARE YOU
ITS IMPOSSIBLE AND ITS REALLY FUCKING WITH MY MIND SOMEONE HUG ME
I CAN MAKE IT SCREAM WITHOUT GETTING LOUDER
H E L P
Holy shit whispering is the same volume as shouting as loud as I can
what have you done
We think in concepts
Concepts have no volume
Because a thought is the loudest silence of all.
whoa there socrates
do you find it weird that you’ve known your parents for your entire life but they’ve only known you for a portion of theirs
i hate pants that make it look like i have a boner when i sit but then i remember im a girl but i still worry that somebody will think i have a boner
Do… Girls really worry about this?
OH MY GOD STOP SAYING THAT DOCTORS SHOULDN’T SAY ‘IT’S A BOY’ OR ‘IT’S A GIRL’ AT BIRTH
IT’S NOT ABOUT ‘FORCING GENDER ROLES ON BABIES’ IT’S ABOUT ENSURING THAT THE CHILD GETS THE BEST CARE POSSIBLE BASED ON THEIR BIOLOGICAL SEX JFC
anyways what else would they say if they can’t announce boy or girl.
"it’s a thing!"
yeah that’s not gonna work.
"It sure is a baby alright"
do you ever get in those moods where you don’t feel like reading and you don’t feel like being on the internet and you don’t feel like watching a show and you don’t feel like sleeping and you don’t feel like existing in general
BUT YOU WANT TO DO SOMETHING.It’s in words